I look at my friendship with her as like having a gall stone. You deal with it, there is pain, and then you pass it. That's all I have to say about Schmadonna. - - - Sandra Bernhard (about Madonna)

Not in this lifetime. Why? Because I'm the only one she hasn't done it to. - - -
Sharon Stone (when told Madonna has said she wants to kiss her)

She is closer to organized prostitution than anything else. - - - Morrissey (about Madonna, 1986)

She is so hairy, when she lifted up her arm, I thought it was Tina Turner in her armpit. - - - Joan Rivers (about Madonna)

If I found her floating in my pool, I'd punish my dog. - - - Joan Rivers (about Yoko Ono)

A senescent bimbo with a lust for home furnishings. - - - Barbara Ehrenreich (about Nancy Reagan)

Attila the Hen. - - - Clement Freud (about Margaret Thatcher) 

She looked like a huge ball of fur on two well-developed legs. - - - Nancy Mitford (about Princess Margaret, 1959)

No woman of our time has gone further with less mental equipment. - - - Clifton Fadiman (about Clare Booth Luce)

She is a lady short on looks, absolutely deprived of any dress sense, has a figure like a Jurassic monster . . . very greedy when it comes to loot, no tact and wants to upstage everyone else. - - - Sir Nicholas Fairbairn (about Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York)

She looks like something that would eat its young. - - - Dorothy Parker (about Dame Edith Evans)

She must use Novocain lipstick. - - - Jack Paar (about Dorothy Kilgallen)

She was a master at making nothing happen very slowly. - - - Clifton Fadiman (about Gertrude Stein)

She was divinely, hysterically, insanely malevolent. - - - Bette Davis (about Theda Bara)